Or, “Redheads are fussy.”

I picked up my new-to-me 1999 Honda VFR800I on a cool Thursday in March.  That Friday at work, the clock moved slower than it had in months.  After dropping off my car-pool partner and zipping home in my Forester, I was eager to take the Viffer out for a Friday night date.

Quickly donning the leather gear - with the insulated liner in the jacket to ward off the cool March air - and grabbing my good ol’ Shoei dragon helmet, I scurried downstairs to the garage.  A turn of the key lit up the gauges; flicking the engine cut-off switch to the ON position sent the fuel injection system humming for a full second and a half; thumbing the starter button rewarded me with…click-click.  Damn!  In disbelief, I tried it several more times, with the same results.  The dealership gave me a bum battery!

I pulled the battery from the Bandit and found that they are the same size.  Too bad the Bandit’s been sitting since last September, and its battery was in the same state of discharge.  No time to screw around with the dealership - they’ll just give me another used battery near the end of it’s life anyway.  I jumped back in the Subie and hit the Cycle Gear store in Springfield, PA for a new battery. Back home, the Schumacher Battery Companion had it charged in less than an hour, and this gave me time to grab a light dinner and check the usual motorcycle message boards, including my newest find: VFRDiscussion.com.

With some daylight still left, the new battery brought the V-4 motor to life and put a big smile on my face.  Too late (and getting too cold) for a proper ride to a proper dinner, I decided to just run it downtown to show it off to some friends.  I spent two hours at Paddy’s Pub (yes, the one from the show - I’ve been going there since 1995, long before it was famous) sipping water with lemon, realizing that I don’t like smoky bars when I’m sober.  On the way home, I stopped at a diner for a late snack; or was it because I just didn’t want the ride to end yet?

So, what did I learn in my first day with the 1999 VFR?  Well, in no particular order:

• Don’t assume a dealership has gone over everything on the bike.  Check it yourself and ask every question that pops into your head.
• There’s no replacement for displacement.  While the VFR and the Bandit both have published peak horsepower numbers at 105 (stock), the Bandit has so much more available torque down low.  Considering that’s where I tend to ride most of the time, especially around town, the VFR felt a little down on power until I spun up the V-4 a bit, then the power felt comparable.
• The turn signal switch requires a very deliberate touch.  I don’t think this is just because the bike is 10 years old - I’ve ridden older bikes with lighter signal switchgear - but I find I really have to push on the switch to get the signal to come on.  Maybe it’s a Honda thing.  Not a big deal, really, but it’s something that stands out in my mind.
• Handling on the VFR is subconscious, compared to the Bandit.  Turning the Bandit sometimes required some forethought, especially as speeds picked up.  The VFR, by comparison, just turns where I want, when I want, without any real planning or conscious thought.  I’ve read that others think the VFR is heavy and slow-turning compared to true sportbikes, but since I have little experience on such machines, the VFR might as well be one as far as I’m concerned.
• The VFR turns heads!  Sure, the Bandit got looks, both in original S-model silver plastic and in recent black streetfighter form, but most of those were confused “What the hell is that?” looks.  The VFR gets those “That’s a good-looking bike!” looks.
• The VFR could use some new brake pads.  I’m thinking the dealership let me down again, and just put some cheap pads on it to pass inspection.  It stops well enough, but even the linked brakes seem weak compared to the Bandit’s six-piston front calipers and braided-steel lines.
• It’s still cold, but the bugs are out already, and they like the VFR too.  The VFR’s windscreen puts a lot of air flow right into my helmet visor.  Bugs ride the wind up through the windscreen’s vent and die horribly just inches from my eyes.  Oh, the humanity,…er, the insectity!
• If I’m gonna stay sober, I might as well stay home.  Bars are smelly, nasty places to hang out, and only alcohol makes them tolerable.  Well, alcohol or a gorgeous sexy redhead, even if she is a bit fussy.

I recently purchased a new helmet, to celebrate my return to motorcycling.  Besides, some of my Shoei helmets are old enough to be retired.  I surfed on over to Helmet Harbor and browsed the under-$200 helmets for something nice.  I found the SparX brand (not sure if its pronounced “sparks” or “spar ex” like they say on the Helmet Harbor video review), and was immediately attracted to the Skulls graphics.  The red on black with the skulls and barbed-wire was kind of the same feel I was going for by putting a little red paint on the black Bandit.  The list of features, especially the light weight and included tinted visor, sold me on it.

Flash-forward a few weeks.  My Bandit is running, and I’m off on my trip to New England.  Hitting the slower twisty roads in the early morning, I found the SparX S-07 to be quite breezy.  Not a bad thing in warmer weather, but the over-abundance of airflow made my head downright frigid in the morning chill.  Closing the vents (one large chin vent, and two small vents atop the visor) did very little to alleviate the mass airflow.  Taking my helmet off, I had two distinct parts in my hair where the air flowed across the top of my head.  This seems like it will be a good thing when the weather turns warm, but on chilly mornings and especially on the highway, the airflow is definitely too much.

Later in the day, I found that bugs would ride the airflow up under the chinbar and into the face area.  I would have to pop the visor open and turn my head to set the little guys free.  This was annoying at first, then became quite unacceptable.  No matter what configuration I used with the vents, I would still get the airflow coming in from under the chinbar.  The chin vent is easily manipulated, but the visor vents are quite small and are quite difficult to manipulate with gloves on.  I haven’t been riding the naked Bandit for long, so I’m not sure how my other helmets would fare, but the SparX would also try to lift off my head at anything over 80mph.  A removable chin curtain would probably help with the bugs and the lift at highway speeds.

The entire padded lining is removable for cleaning, held in with several snaps.  The chin pads are seperate from the rest of the liner.  Descriptions say the helmet is designed to allow for small speakers over the ears.  While the helmet fits me snugly (the way I like ‘em), the areas over the ears are more shallow than in other helmets, and really make using even small ear buds uncomfortable, especially when taking the helmet off.

On the bright side, the helmet comes with a spare tinted visor (very dark), and the quick-release mechanism works as well as any other helmets I’ve owned.  The matte paint has an almost satin feel to it, and I really like the graphics.  Also included is a cloth helmet cover with drawstring, SparX stickers for the bike or toolbox, and a set of orange foamy earplugs.  The interior liner also has a small loop sewn into it to store your earplugs when the helmet is off.

The helmet is very light, at 3lbs, 5.3oz, due partly to the ECE-2205 safety standard, which allows for shells made of softer materials.  ECE-2205 is the new British standard, and is generally accepted to be better than the American DOT.  This SparX helmet is also, of course, DOT-approved.

By far, the best feature is the “crashed helmet policy” SparX offers.  If my helmet is ever damaged from an accident, all I have to do is send the helmet back with a police report of the accident and a brief description of how the helmet performed, and SparX will send a free replacement.  Not a bad idea.  I think Shoei and Arai would sell more of their >$500 helmets if they offered a similar deal.

All in all, I think this is an okay helmet for the price.  It will be good for around town and short trips, especially in the summer.  If I go on a long trip that will involve cooler temps and/or highway riding, I’d rather use one of my Shoei helmets.  Helmet Harbor has great service, and their video reviews are usually quite thorough and accurate.  This time, however, I think they neglected to give this helmet a real test ride.  Looking at just the features and its light weight, it does seem like a good deal, but I think HJC and Scorpion have better quality and a better selection in the sub-$200 category.